MAKE ME A SANDWICH Hannibal Buress

I don't like when people say, I'll pray for you.
So basically you're going to sit at home and do nothing?
That's what your prayers are, you're doing nothing, while I struggle with the situation.
Don't pray for me, make me a sandwich or something, because I'm very upset right now and I can't make my own sandwich, so it would be cool if you could make me a sandwich or something instead of praying, because praying is lazy.

"We'll keep you in our thoughts"

With the other bullshit in your heads? No, keep me out of your thoughts, because I hear some of the stuff you talk about and if that's close to what you're thinking about, I don't want to be around that, so keep me and my family out of your thoughts, unless you're thinking of making me a sandwich.

Hannibal Buress - Make me a sandwich.

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